Kicking Things Up A Notch... Again

The story started a little while ago... A few months, to be somewhat precise. At the time, I was still helping my dad out with his little restaurant. An old friend of my dad came along and started talking about some SIM cards and stuff while I was preoccupied with other matters. Before long, my dad called me to join at their table and convinced me to do whatever his friend had briefed him about. It was against my own will, but at this point my arm was twisted and there was nothing I could do to stay out of it.

 
From then on, I got signed up to be a BeONE Sales Executive, or to put it in layman terms, I sell BeONE SIM cards. Well, at least that's what I'm supposed to do, anyway. I just never bothered about it until one day when I finally caved in and said to myself "you know what? I guess it's worth a try."

That day was at least a week ago, but by the time I finally made that decision, my account was deactivated as I have been inactive for a long time. Few text messages and hours later, I'm back again. But why? What has made me cave into the very thing I was once against?


Remember in one of my previous articles where I talked about finally landing a job? Well, while I'm still there, the Full Movement Control Order (FMCO) meant that the showroom is close, and nobody wanted to a buy a car in these times - which also translates to no source of income. Naturally, I was devastated, but there was no way I'm gonna take this sitting down - I had to get out and do something as Working From Home is just not my kind of thing. Got back to doing Lalamove, but even that proved to be tough as it doesn't pay you much and there aren't many Driver jobs. I could get out from 9am to 5pm driving for Lalamove, and I have tried that twice, but I just didn't see the worth of sitting behind the steering wheel for most of your hours waiting for a job to come by. Things are a little easier on Fridays and Sundays, though, as my dad and grandma now runs an online business and I do deliveries for them, and I guess it certainly is something.

But still, doing those jobs are nice and all, but I still want to look at other options. That's when I decided to give this BeONE Prepaid thing a try. Yes, it is technically a Pyramid Scheme, but it's one of those that actually bears a whiff of legitimacy to it unlike some MLM companies out there. For one, if I sell SIM cards and my customers continuously top up, I earn a bit of commission from that. Even if I don't find someone else to be an agent under me, at the very least I still get a tiny hint of income. Sounds like a tempting proposition, but I am also made clear that I still need to put in the effort if I want spectacular results out of it.


Which neatly brings onto my next point. On some days, I'll have a heart full of fire. An undying passion in me to bring myself forward to the next step. It felt like I've already laid out the foundation as to what my life direction would be in the next 5 to 10 years. But then the next day come and I become extremely demotivated and completely lost. I'm not sure if this is supposed to be normal, but all that fire in me just seem to extinguish without any apparent warning. I have long noticed that my mental health fluctuates every now and then and at the time of this writing, I'm at my lowest point where I just feel like giving it all up. I mean what else am I supposed to do now? All I've been doing is eat, sleep, go online and gaming. I've repeatedly done this mistake of jumping into a hole without a solid escape plan and now I'm paying the price for it. I could blame it all on the pandemic but in reality, I was the idiot who brought this upon myself. Was even told that I've gained weight, which I guess says a lot.
 
But enough of me beating myself up for it. I am sure someday, I'll get past through all this. Maybe one day, I will end up meeting someone who would be going through this sea of conflicting emotions as I am right now, and I will have no rights to tell them that they'll be fine or to that effect because they can't see it - just like me right now. But whoever that person is, I'll make sure to guide them wherever and whenever possible. As for me, I guess I don't really have a choice other than to keep thriving on regardless of whatever hell life has to throw. Maybe someday, I will finally catch my break and gradually make my dreams come true.

Now if you excuse me, I got some SIM cards to sell. See you in the next update.

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